Tiny TweaksTo Prevent Your Past from Sabatoging Your Present

Why You Should Forgive

why-you-should-forgive

The weak can never forgive.  Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.

Mahatma Gandhi

One of the worst things you can do is to live with hate in your heart.  Resentment is a poison that will slowly destroy your soul.  When you go through life with a heart filled of hate you end up only hurting yourself.

Being able to forgive is hard, I’m not denying that.  However, it’s important to understand that forgiveness is not surrender.  Forgiveness is not saying, “I’m okay with how you treated me.”

For a long time I lived with hate in my heart.  It was towards my own family member, for something they did a long time ago.  Longer in fact than my children have been alive, and I have two in college now!  I honestly don’t even remember the whole story that caused the situation.  But I’ll never forget the day I decided to change things.

Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them so much.

Oscar Wilde

 

That Glorious Day

The thought of attending another family event had put me in a foul mood.  So foul, that my wife decided to make a stand.

“The kids and I are going to stay here, you go, send our regards.  We’ll talk when you come home tonight.”  – She announced twenty minutes before we were scheduled to leave.

“Why?”  – I asked but I think I already knew the reason.

“You’re not fun to be around when you let these things upset you.  The way you’re behaving is not the way we want to raise our children.  We’re not going to let your troubles dictate our happiness.  Your children will have more fun today without you.” 

POW!   That hit me right between the eyes.

She taught me one of the most important lessons of my life that day…

Forgiveness is taking control of your own happiness.  Forgiveness is having inner strength.  The inner strength and confidence to say, “I am not going to let what you did to me, ruin my chance for happiness.  I am not going to forget what happened, but I am going to put it behind me and move on.  I choose not to live with hate in my heart.”

I decided right then and there that I was not going to allow anyone to ever control my own happiness again.  Believe me it’s not easy, but I kick-started the process to making amends.  Although I’m still working on the process, it is getting easier, and I haven’t lost important time with my family since.

Learn from what happened and let it go.   Being able to forgive is medicine for the soul.  Forgive and you’ll sweep the hurt and resentment from your heart.  The more time we spend hating, the less time we have to love those who mean the most.


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